Hey Venckman, where do these stairs go?

They go up.

I should have guessed that a trail called "1000 Steps" would be a bit of a challenge. I am sure now that there are actually more like eleventy-billion steps on this trail. 1000 definitely would not have taken so long. The trail is part of the Mount Dandenong National Park, just outside of Melbourne, at Ferntree Gully. (Wasn't that a Disney movie?) Ferntree Gully is packed with, you guessed it: fern trees.



It was a beautiful hike. The morning fog had just rolled out and everything was green and cool and oy, humid. A small price to pay though, for the scenery. The sad fact is that once you climb said 1000 steps, you aren't even at the top! Just more mountain to climb and nowhere is there a topo map to tell you how far you've come or how far you've left to go. It's like people go there just to be at one with nature! Ah, well, it's a good place for that. :)


After the trip through the bush, Gen and I went to the biggest mall in Melbourne. Not exactly "Lonely Planet" worthy, but she was itching to spend money and I wanted to see what Aussie capitalism was like. It was like any other gigantic mall I've been to (surprise) only they charged $140 for Wranglers. $120 for Levi's, $120 for a Member's Only jacket (What is the world coming to?!) and get this, $50 for a t-shirt that says "Sioux City, Iowa Eagles". WHAT?

All of this shopping made us hungry and I was craving a salad. Gen's a vegetarian, so it worked well. We went to the Veggie Bar, on so trendy it's trashy Brunswick Street, where the service is terrible, but that is OK since you don't tip here. Anyway, my house salad came with spring rolls (?) and consisted of yams, potatoes, beets, sauteed mushrooms, at least a tomato and a half, corn on the cob, red bell pepper, did I say beets?, and some lettuce on top. Not exactly your normal salad, but I definitely wasn't hungry when I left. (Just in case you're wondering, Gen ate the beets. I have my limits.) This immediately put me into a food coma and after kicking Gen out of the car at her apartment, I beelined it back to the burbs to do some proper vegging out.

Goal: DVD rental. Accomplished? uh, yup. The tricky bit was when I stepped into the shop that had "DVD rentals here" emblazoned all over it's windows and I didn't notice that it was an Indian market. Three minutes into the renter-initiation speech, I realized that they only rent Indian movies. Too embarrassed to leave empty handed, I'm soon going to sit and watch "Salam Namaste" which was filmed entirely in Melbourne. Not to be distracted from my goal of American trash cinema, I found the other DVD rental shop, neon lights blazing, half a block away.

Tim tams and pjs are a-waiting, so I'm off to watch my movies. Until tomorrow...